Ducks 42, Cowboys 31

Life is good.

Pet-of-the-Quarter

Richard and I have decided to initiate a program at home designed to encourage, and reward, good behavior among the four pawed population of our homestead. (Okay, Richard is going along with the idea as long as he doesn’t have to do any more work and it doesn’t disturb his rest.) We call it the Pet-of-the Quarter. It is designed after the Employee-of-the-Month program that many businesses have been using for decades to coerce their workforce into acceptable performance modes.

The program is simple. One week before the end of the quarter, we accept nominations from the floor (and countertops) for the soon-to-be prestigious honor. Each family member may nominate one family member who bears fur. They need to give a short presentation, not only mentioning who they are nominating, but also why they are nominating said darling creature. Then Richard and I will contemplate the nominations for a week and the two of us will put our heads together and come up with the winner of the Pet-of-the Quarter. The winner will get extra treats, a paw massage and other various and sundry rewards. We discussed a special parking place, but thought that was a tad over the top.

Max was the first to nominate someone. He nominated himself. He claimed that his superior hunting prowess had garnered him the respect and admiration of all his housemates, and he had obviously saved lives by catching and destroying a disease-infested mouse two months ago. (Authors note: the mouse was still attached to our computer when Max caught it, and there is no conclusive evidence that it had a virus.)

Spike, being more humble and retrospect, took his turn to nominate his big brother, Ralph. He pointed out that Ralph had never stepped on him and taught him all he knows about drooling. (Pound for pound, Spike is one dynamite drooler. Ralph taught him well.)

Trixie just shook her head and muttered something about “another ridiculous idea put out by the Bourgeoisie designed to keep the fur-bearing masses in line.” She then snorted and lay down, her disgust obvious.

Ralph was just watching his co-horts with a touch of amusement, and then we watched his eyes light up. He nominated Maxine. (Maxine is Alix’ wiener dog. They both stayed at the house when Richard and I were in Europe.) Ralph was quick to point out that not only has Maxine caused no problems around the homestead this quarter, but apparently while house-sitting she actually bit Max. The other kids still laugh and tell jokes about the incident. Unless Max is around, then they are eerily quiet.

Neither Richard nor I could come up with a candidate. We stared blankly into space.

So, for the fourth-quarter of 2008, the nominees are:
Max, the hunter
Ralph, the graceful teacher
Maxine, the trouble-free comedienne

Do we honor the computer accessory killer, the teacher of drool or a biting outsider? It will be a tough decision.

White Christmas

32" later. I think I can safely say this is the whitest Christmas I've had the pleasure to meet.

I am getting tired of shoveling; my back just ain't what it used to be. But as long as there is snow, I will be happy.

Snowzilla has caught my fancy. I do have 3 days off. I've done more bizarre things in my time.

Joyeux Noël

Christmas day nears. I wish you all a joyous holiday.
Frolijk Kerstmas en gelukkig niewe jaar.

And so this is winter.

Much has changed in the last week. The Upper Valley has finally gotten a touch of real winter. Just in time for the solstice.

We have about 2 feet of snow on the ground now. Interstate 84 between Hood River and Troutdale is closed and Highway 14 is closed between White Salmon and Washougal. This morning, for the first time this winter, I had to shovel the driveway. Please note, I did have to shovel it twice in late fall of this year. I even took a day off work last week to keep our driveway passable. Richard’s car gets in and out fine. My pick-up has been stationary since Tuesday.



But, it is so beautiful. And I get invigorated when I’m out in it. (Okay, this morning it was 0⁰. It was a tad too invigorating.) I do love the snow and winter.


We are a house divided on that sentiment. Three enjoy winter: three wish it banished to the hinterlands. I’ll let you guess the stands of the rest of the brood.

The Blizzard of '08 - Day Whatever

Finally, a real snow!

Christmas Cactus

It isn't every year that this happens.

We're Saints

Finally, the weather suits our desires.

The Blizzard of '08 - Day Two

Mother Nature, with her icy tentacles, has dished a second day of Arctic weather to the Columbia River Gorge. With 48-hour snow totals nearing 2 inches, the entire region is paralyzed. Public transportation has ground to a halt. All public schools in Skamania, Klickitat, Wasco, Hood River and eastern Multnomah counties are closed for the second day in a row. (The Sherman County School District is expected to make an announcement, regarding the status of classes today as soon as mass is over.) Municipal and County offices, except for emergency personnel are also closed for a second day throughout the region. After a truly harrowing day of delivering mail through the melting slush yesterday, the USPS has curtailed mail service for the day.

While temperatures plummet to something in the 20s, public safety officials are calling on residents to stay home, unless they don’t want to. Fearing shortages in proportions not seen since the great storm of ’82 (or ’84, depending on who is telling the story), the public has rushed Rosauer’s, depleting the supply of toilet paper in the Mid-Columbia to catastrophic levels.

This is a humanitarian crisis in the making. I’m not sure what the greatest needs are in the Gorge at this desperate time, but send me donations and I will make sure they get to those with the greatest necessities. I thank you in advance for your generous contributions to the “Save the Gorge from Ma Nature Fund”.

Local denizens gather to discuss the crisis in the Gorge.

The Blizzard of ‘08

Winter has hit the Upper Valley. The storm started yesterday evening and continued all night. We woke up this morning to damn near an inch of snow. Somehow, in the weather forecast, it sounded like a much harsher storm.

I was kind of hoping for a little more. I’m ready for a good snow.

Hanging up the Gloves

A while ago I was reading about some boxer from Rumania. He was making quite a stir. Apparently, he is still boxing at the feeble old age of 51. The article went on and on about how the poor dimwit was too old to be boxing, too old to take the pounding, too old to tie his shoes without assistance.

And, of course, I kept nodding and thinking to myself, “What is that old geezer thinking? Men of a certain age shouldn’t be doing things like that.”

Then in a bizarre twist of events, I did the math. Born in November. November 1956. That would make me: too old to take up boxing.
Damn, and I was so looking forward to a round or two.

December 8th, 1996. 6:00AM

Won't you let me know

That life is eternal

And love is immortal

And death is only a horizon

Life is eternal

As we move into the light

And a horizon is nothing

Save the limit of our sight

- Carly Simon

Natural Born Enemies

Although it may look like Max has fallen his prey and will soon begin dinner, the truth is he is having a tender moment with his brother, Ralph.

A Rare, Vibrant Sunset

Because of the way our house is situated, we rarely get a beautiful sunset.

But tonight was different.

I know, the picture does it no justice. You should have been here.