Random notes from the Fête du Bon Père.

#1. I’m not admitting that I ate too much, but I did have to be carried to bed on a stretcher. (Thanks, Ralph & Trixie!)

#2. Minn-Duluth’s football game against Minn State-Mankato was postponed due to snow. Wusses! Oregon never postpones its games due to snow. We have a great new invention called the ‘snow-shovel’, and we know how to use it!

#3. It is true. Ice cream isn’t nearly sweet enough without being smothered by a huge ladleful of Johnny Sauce.

#4. I almost made a major faux-pas. I always guard our secret family recipes with the utmost caution and concern. I understand the grave importance of keeping the nitty-gritty details out of the hands of the common masses. I know that if you give ‘John Doe’ the clandestine procedures for preparing macaroni & cheese, the next thing you know there would be a perverted version out there with peas and bacon bits mixed in. Such revolting aberrations are crimes against nature. The bastards responsible should be brought up in front of the tribunal in den Haag (The Hague) and tried for their crimes. The dirty sons-of-…
But I digress.
I was watching The Game when Richard coyly called out from the kitchen, “I’ll turn on the oven for you if you tell me what temp the mac & cheese should be baked at!” I almost blurted out the answer. But for the grace of a moment of senility I would have foolishly given out a family secret. But you have to give it to Richard. He is wily.

#5. Five out of six members of my household prefer a low scoring Duck football game. There seems to be a large demographic of the residents who don’t enjoy earsplitting duck calls or loud screams of “Kill the [expletive deleted] Dawgs. Rip their [expletive deleted]head off and stuff it up their [expletive deleted] [expletive deleted].” Apparently such outbursts make certain members of the household nervous. So, the vast majority of the dwellers of this abode thought yesterday’s game was the most enjoyable of the season. With that said, Richard did admit that at times the silence was worrisome and more than once he sent Ralph in to make sure I hadn’t expired.