HAPPY NEW YEAR

 

From the Palais des Papes!

I have decided to get myself more organized.

 

To said affect, I am dividing my days into 7 stages:

• 1.       Sleep
• 2.       Lying in bed before getting up
• 3.       Things that need to be done to make myself presentable
• 4.       Daily Chores
• 5.       Cocktail Hour (My definition of time is not regulated by any clock.)
• 6.       Getting ready for bed
• 7.       Sleep

I have been creating list of things I have to do to go on to the next stage of the day.

Of course, “Sleep” was a no brainer. I just needed to wake. Then there was some heated debate about the definition of “wake”. Frankly, it got ugly. The whole topic was shelved. 

So, then I went on to “Lying in bed before getting up”. I decided to create a checklist of goals that need to be met (with exception for fire, flood, you know; that disaster movie type of crap) before I split the sheets. Mental exercises, limb checkings, eye focusings, digit countings. That kind of stuff. I am now up to 47 goals that need to be met. 

I did some data mining and extrapolating and checking all exponential factors. According to my most recent calculation, it is estimated that it will be Mid-February before I am allowed out of bed, other than for potty breaks. 

So, I will think about “Things that need to be done to make myself presentable” later. Much later.

A new year is a coming!

 I, as is my annual tradition will be celebrating the new year at the Palais des Papes in Avignon, France. I mean, I will be celebrating the new year at 3PM PST and using my imagination. It’s damn near all I have left. 

Join me if you wish!

Happy Boxing Day!

Just try not to get blood one the new white carpet!

 

No matter how you say it:

Hyvää joulua; Frohe Weinachten; Gëzuar Khrishtlindjet; Egubarri on; Bon natale; Veselé Vánoce; Sretan Božić; Glӕdelig jul; Vrolijk Kerstfeest; häid joule; Maligayang Pasko; Noflike krystdagen; Bo Nadal; κaλά Xρίστoύγννα; Jwaye Nwel; Mele Kalikimaka; Zoo siab heev Christmas; boldog Karácsonyt; Gleẟileg jól; Selamet natal; Joyeux noël; Nollaig Shona; Buon Natale; შოშᲐᲡ ᲒილოცᲐვთ; Kirîstmas piroz be; Priecīgus Ziemassvēkus; щасӆивого Рiздва; Весела Коледа; veselé Vionoce; Feliz navidad;  god Jul: Crăcium ferecit; Schéi Chrëschtdeeg; Wesołych Świąt; linksmų Kalèdų; Feliz Natal: Bon Nadal; il-Milied it-tajjeb;

Have an amazing holiday!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

The HBird Bar and Grill:

It’s just a seedy dive on the wrong side of the tracks; rife with drugs and prostitution and pornography and heavy drinking. You just know that on any given night a brawl will break out and furniture will be broken. Not the type of place where you would bring your mother.

But the HBird does have a loyal clientele. Fiercely loyal. I spoke to two of them. The first requested anonymity, so I will call him “Paul”.

 

“Paul’s” wife thinks he mining the Honeysuckle’s for a needed paycheck. But instead, he is down at the HBird sucking down some sleazy sugar water. “Paul” says he desperately needs relief from the drudgery of daily life, and he finds it a the HBird.

That’s cool “Paul”.

The second patron is Joey.

 

Joey doesn’t give a damn who knows he is here. As he says, he ain’t got no friggin ball and chain holding him down.

He loves the HBird. “There is always some fun goin’ down. Sometimes a crap table appears. Other times it the poker game in a smoky room out back.” He always packs an ace up his sleeve.

As to the frequent fights Joey admits to instigating a few of them, but hey it’s what makes the joint memorable.

See you there soon!

Happy Winter Solstice!!!

 I've been researching customs associated with shortest day of the year.

It seems you can do whatever floats your boat.

Celebrate well!

C'est fini

 

The shower is done. They say I may be able to use it in a day or so.

Cactus Pete has the spirit!

Nothing screams "Happy Holidays" like a cactus with ornaments!

Finally, my bathroom is finished

 

My shower was old and dated. It screamed 1969 or 1965, hard to be sure.

But I hired one of those one day renovation companies.

I got a fresh new look.

It is a new avant-garde look. I tell you, my design is cutting edge. I expect copycats left and right.

So. Dakota St. 42, Holy Cross 21

 I'm sure that just like me, you have all been celebrating the Jackrabbit's victory over Holy Cross. (Dancing in the street is not recommended for people who live on major thoroughfares.)

Jack's are in semis: only Montana St. stands in their way to the national championship game!

GO JACKS!

The first signs of Christmas:

Technically, Karla hasn’t approved of the St. Bernard hanging over the TV, but not to worry, he is of the dry-mouth variety of Saints.

Yes, we have our tree. Don’t you just love how we chose to decorate it!!! It just gets me into the spirit of Christmas.

And, of course we have Poinsettias. Sadly, almost immediately after they came home something was easting on them. So, I sprayed them with an oil that is supposed to suppress all sort of stuff. I have quarantined the live Poinsettias to a remote gulag on the back porch. 

HO HO HO!!!

We have an honored guest.

 

Batman has come to visit, and he has claimed Karla's bed as his own.

His appearance makes for strange bedfellows. Just proves if you ignore it, it isn't a true and credible danger.

(And it makes a great excuse to not make my bed!)

Yay, Batman!!!

A more upbeat note:

Happy 83rd Birthday, Tina!

You will always rock those high heels!

Good Night, Irene

 

I'm gonna live forever

Baby, remember my name.

Irene Cara's "Fame" is unforgettable.

I will miss you, Irene.

Thought for the day

 "The boy throws stones at the frogs in jest. But the frogs die in earnest."

 by Joanna Russ (a quote from her mother).

I first read this many years ago. I was 9 or 10 years old. Soon before reading the quote, I had thrown a rock at flock of birds. And much to my shock, and I am sure to the shock of everyone who knows my great athletic prowess, I hit one of them.

I was wracked with remorse at the time: it didn't help reading this.

I have never thrown a stone at a living being again. (Note: I don't have to count the time in Kansas when I rammed a few quails with a rental car. It was an accident. The authorities opted not to detain me.)

Happy Thanksgiving!

 

As you down your Thanksgiving feast, be sure to take a moment to learn what really happened on the first Thanksgiving. Learn what happened to the Wampanoag people (and the other indigenous tribes) since the Europeans 'found' the new world.

It ain't pretty!

I'm not saying, "Don't celebrate", just keep the truth in mind.

I was just on YouTube

 Listening to Billie Holiday sing "Strange Fruit".

Reminded me of Montgomery, Alabama.

Sobering moment!

THE NEW COUNTERTOPS ARE HERE!!! THE NEW COUNTERTOPS ARE HERE!!!

 

I would be dancing on the countertops, but they told me I couldn't for the next twenty-four hours. After that, just watch out!!!

As with everything in my life, this is still undone. You may notice that there is about 3/4 of an inch gap between the countertop and the back splash. Now I have to find something to fill in the gap.

Why is nothing easy!

It was just an unfortunate incident from the very onset.

 I wasn’t expecting to get blindsided and trashed. Yes, I was in the bad side of town. I live in the bad side of town. What was I to do? Go sleep in my car in a more chichi part of town. I don’t think so.

It comes down to: he says, it says. He being me. It being a toilet possessed by the devil.

My story is that I was peacefully urinating into a receptacle that was designed for that purpose. The demon-possessed piece of porcelain then reached up and slapped me across the face with its seat. And then it stomped on my big toe.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Happy Birthday, dear Washington!

 

133 years old, and doesn't look a day over 119.

Party's on!

The Day After the Day After Election Day.

 I must admit, I am very pleased with the results from Tuesday.

We all won!

Whether you are liberal or moderate or conservative, Republican or Democrat, right wing or left wing: no bloc can claim a victory (although some are). But that also means there is no bloc that needs to hang its head and walk the walk of shame.

We all won!

Ain't America Great!

It's election day.

 SO VOTE!!!!!!!!

And remember we all will win!

All those damnable political ads will end!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

The monks are on the march!

 

From Richard's collection. I have a feeling they were his artwork, but I'm not positive.

They protect the kitchen now.

Begone ye spirits of the demon devil!

11-4-22

 Only 9 days left until the Fȇte du Bon Père!

YAY!!!!!

Time to harvest the candy corn!

Live from Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, Nevada

 

ELTON JOHN!!!

It was an amazing concert!!!

'The Bitch if Back': dedicated to Liisa!

Oh, and another red letter date.

 I signed the papers for my second mortgage. Soon I will be RICH!!! RICH!!! RICH!!!

Okay, I'll be able to pay my debts.

Kitchens and bathrooms ain't cheap!

Sister Bertrille

 

For some reason, whenever I see the table like this I think of 'The Flying Nun". Don't worry the table doesn't fly.

(And I just put a second coat of Pecan Oil on it. Waiting for it to totally soak in.)

A struggle

 For some reason, the last few days have been difficult for me.

I have come out before that I was dealing from depression. I don't know if this is just depression worsening, or if there is more. And don't worry, I have no suicidal tendences.

Okay, first I came out that I was gay, then I came out that I suffered from depression, now I coming out about my alcoholism. I'm not sure what way to go. Richard told me his first six months of sobriety were the worst times of his life.

I don't know how much time is left. But I know one day the boot is going to drop. 

Why not pickle myself in pleasure!

The kitchen

 

As of today. Quartz countertops are coming!

In the jungle

 The mighty jungle

The lion sleeps tonight.

Once again taking her half out of the middle.

She doesn't like to be disturbed. I may be sleeping at the foot of the bed (again) tonight.

At long last

 

My bathroom is starting to look like I meant it to appear.

Thanks to Duardo, Charlie, Ismael and Gabriel, all is coming up roses.

I think we should get an award for the most avant-garde atrium decorum

 

Or maybe rednecks-of-the-year. Hard to say.

GO JACKS!!!!!!!!

 

I'm sure you all were on the edge of your seats, like I was as the #3 ranked SDSU Jacks beat the #1 NDSU Bison.

That coupled with #2 Montana's loss to Idaho means the Jacks will be ranked #1 in the next poll.

KICK ASS, SOUTH DAKOTA STATE!!!

Another acting great has left us

 

You will be missed, Angela.

Red Letter Date!

 Today I will, for the first time in my 65 years on this planet, attend a baby shower.

Yes, there is a baby shower. Is it for Savvy and Ken, or for baby boy Faith-Bules?

Now I hate to sound out of kilter, but I have no idea what to expect.

First, I was never technically invited, so any info that may have been contained in the invitation is a secret from me. Karla did tell me that the shower starts at 2:30 and a barbecue at 4. 

I am giving a fairly inappropriate gift: a plant. I have no clue who's names to put on the outside of the envelope, and scant clue as to what to write inside. I have no idea what to wear. I really don't know what happens at a baby shower, and I'm not sure I really want to know.

But, I am peeling off one more level of virginity!

Old table; New use.

 

Yes, Mom & Dad's old kitchen table is now on the back porch serving as an outdoor spot to gather.

A little sanding (okay, a lot of sanding) and some pecan oil and I'm pretty happy with how it looks. I know it does need more oil, but the directions say to let it set a few days before reapplying oil.

The chairs bizarrely work with the table in my feeble mind.

A candle for Nancy

 

My friend from Hood River, Nancy Moore, passed recently. (I just found out.) In the tradition of Wayno, I lit a candle for her. 

My heartfelt sorrow goes out to Geoff, Stephanie, Liz, Nathan and the extended family.

Nancy was known for her middle finger, and I'm giving it right back at her.

Be at peace, dear woman.

Happy Birthday!

 

To two of my favorite sisters.

Have fun!

Ode to a fallen comrade

 

We had strong winds: Diablo Winds is one of their given names.

Poor Poblano Pepper had no chance: the evilness of the winds is evident.

Now before we use up all the tissues crying like babies, lets remember that the poblano pepper plant is an annual. This one is from last spring. He led a long life, but he had no business still being alive. But I must say he was a handsome plant. That saved him from being uprooted months ago.

As to pepper production. There were two. One small and one very small.

I think I will rent a booth at the local farmer's market to sell them.

It is official

 

I am a dweeb. 

That is a term from my youth that is probably even more offensive now than it was then. Or maybe it just died a natural death. Anyway, we are talking about me, so use the term kindly.

I am a little worried. Does the DMV know something it don't? It sure reads like I expire on June 30, 2023.

I have to hang on for that friggin' long?

Hello! It’s me again

Another random thought, as I dig my way thru the genealogical graveyard.

Woods and Wallace, so sweet that 4 siblings married 4 siblings. Until you learn that they are all 1^st cousins.

Voilà! I am explained!

Thank Hannah and Peter!

Just a random thought from the middle of nowhere

 I try to stifle myself much of the time. If you knew how truly bizarre I am, you would just back away.

I was listening to the song "Rock and Roll Heaven" by the Righteous Brothers, and the line "If you believe in forever, then life is just a one night stand".

Damn, ain't that the truth. 

Just kinda tweaked a nerve for me. What more is there?