I’d Like to Propose a New National Holiday.

Earlier today, while I was perusing the internet, I read that on May 7th, 1660, in den Haag, Netherlands, Isaak (Isaack) Fubine patented macaroni. I had never really thought of macaroni as a Dutch delicacy, but it is one more reason to love Holland. Someone told me once that it is possible that something could be on the internet and not be true. Although I personally find that hard to believe, I felt it would be prudent of me to try and prove or disprove the theory that Isaak (Issack) is my hero and I adore the man.

First, I think you will all be stunned to know that there are literally dozens of web pages out there that deal with the history of macaroni. Apparently there is quite a cult of macaroniists with access to computers. Kind of warms my cockles. Some of them mention the Etruscans, some the Arabs, others the Jews and some even mentioned Sicily. Nobody seems to really agree about much of anything regarding the origins of macaroni. But that is, of course, different than patenting macaroni. I did find multiple sites that confirmed that Isaak (Isaack) B. Fubine of Savoy patented macaroni on this date. (Apparently there is some controversy regarding the spelling of Ike's first name.)

Armed with that indisputable evidence, I would like to propose that May 7th be a national holiday. I feel this would be an amazing thing, as macaroniism is a secular idealism that could unite Arabs and Jews, Christians and Pagans. This could be the one thing that will bond liberals and conservatives. Anti-abortionist and Pro-lifers could sit together and enjoy true gluttony without the harsh militarism.

Join the movement today. Contact your congressperson and demand that May 7th be declared National Macaroni Day. Ask that Isaak (Isaack) Fubine’s picture be placed on the one dollar bill. Stand up for what is right and just.